


I Dreamed This Last Week When I Fell Asleep at 7 AM

by Victoria_Project



Series: Shenanigans feat. Lady Sia and co. [2]
Category: Lady Sia (Video Game), Touhou Project, WWE
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I can't write a proper crackfic without swear words, I have a weird sense of humor, Insomnia, Lady Sia is a badass, Onimen is a wuss, Reimu is only mentioned, Swearing, Weirdness, and I'm cosplaying as Aya, and that's why my dreams are also weird, dream - Freeform, except for the dream which is just a dream, personal, real story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-11
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2020-02-29 22:46:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18787804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Victoria_Project/pseuds/Victoria_Project
Summary: This is a weird dream that I had when I didn't sleep at night and end up sleeping in the morning.This work contains swearing, hence the rating. If that's not your thing, I made abowdlerized versionof it.





	I Dreamed This Last Week When I Fell Asleep at 7 AM

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually scary when I'm dreaming it but I ended up laughing when I woke up. Seriously, the way that the Russian witch's cat approaches Lady Sia in their fight was pretty creepy. But since I have a weird sense of humor, I ended up writing it as something funnier.

So, I can't sleep at the night of May 2 and my mother bitched about it in the morning of May 3. At that point it was like 6:00 am and she kept forcing me to go to my room and just go the fuck to sleep and kept bitching every time I go out to get water. So I was forced to stay in my room to stare at stuff until I pass out sleeping at like, 7:00 am. And this is when the bullshit parade begins.

So in my dream, there's The Undertaker. Seriously guys, I don't even know shit about wrestling. I just knew this guy when I watched that crappy Scooby-Doo WWE cartoon and remembered him again when I watched [this](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=71_wKR73rWA) video.

So anyway, The Undertaker, right? for some reason he decided to bust in into someone's house by climbing the window. But turns out he sucks at choosing what windows to climb 'cause the window he climbs in leads him to the room where the owner of the house, a hot Russian witch, is staying.

"What the fuck? No trespassers!" the Russian witch said as she sends her large-ass, creepy, derp cat to maul the shit out of the wrestler but before the cat can reach him, Lady Sia and the Mysterious Man grabbed him and pulled him out of the window, saving his ass like a deus ex machina.

So, the three of them got away and for some reason, the Russian witch and her cat chases after them. Maybe because one of them secretly stole some stuff. My dream was not clear at this point. Anyway, they reached the Snowy Mountain and Sia decided to fight the Russian witch and then the Mysterious Man and the Undertaker just randomly disappeared but I chose to believe that Sia told them to keep going while she fights the witch.

So Lady Sia fights the Russian witch and her cat and wins. And then she catches up with the two dudes and they end up in a huge-ass cave. Seriously, this cave is so huge that Sia has to ride her bird to go through it. So while she flies her bird through the cave, a bunch of danmaku flies around and she dodges them like a side-scrolling Reimu Hakurei. After a few seconds of dodging, Onimen fucking appears. Yep, Onimen, the furry-creating, small-ball having, pussy-ass archenemy of Lady Sia.

So Onimen is like, "Ha! Got you now, bitch. The Russian witch is actually me because you know what they say, ['If at first you don't succeed, try crossdressing.'](http://bettermyths.com/bonus/)"

"BULLSHIT." Sia shouts back at him and then they engage in a Touhou-style but side-scrolling danmaku fight and I was flying there dressed as Aya Shameimaru, taking pictures of them blast the shit out of each other but at that moment, my mom fucking wakes me up at exactly 1:00 PM and that's the end of my weird-ass dream and I'm writing this instead of sleeping again.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading my shit. It's 3:45 AM now and I'm trying to sleep. (I wrote and finished this last week, May 4, but I didn't have the time and Internet access to post it)
> 
> Also, what I didn't mention and remembered just now is that just after Sia enters the cave, she was met by a ghostly Cheyenne, her sister, who was riding on a zombie horse and saying, "Sia, let's race..." in a creepy sort of way. Sia chases after her and Cheyenne throws some fireballs and that's why there are danmaku floating around. After a while, Cheyenne and her horse just faded away and Onimen flies in from the upper left corner of the screen (my dream resembles the game at this point but it was more darker and creepy. The Undertaker breaking into the witch's house part resembles the intro).

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [I Dreamed This Last Week When I Fell Asleep at 7 AM (Bowdlerized)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18930406) by [Victoria_Project](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Victoria_Project/pseuds/Victoria_Project)




End file.
